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3. Why is the family the mót important influence on the children?
In each family the role of parents is important. In Vietnamese tradition, men are usually the owners of the family. The father is the mainstay, the expression of the highest cultural personality so that children learn and follow. Mother is the prop, the main psychological nucleus, the source of fire loving warm family, source of infinite love for children. So the family is the first cultural cradle to shape the personality of children.
The baby is born from the mother's womb, is fed from the breast milk, is listening to her mother's warmth to fall asleep. She is the first child to be contacted when crying, who teaches children from words to eat, teach children the first steps. In addition to parent-child relationships, there are also conjugal relationships. This is the basic relationship between the natural, biological, economic and moral aspects. Family culture in general, spousal relationship in particular has a direct influence on the formation and development of personality of family members. The moral atmosphere of the family directly affects the way of thinking, the way of life of children. All conflicts in the family, especially between parents, affect the children. In the thinking of young children always keep the shape, the words of parents.
In the family, in addition to the relations mentioned above there is a relationship between grandparents and grandchildren, siblings and children. The stronger the relationship, the more it enriches the spiritual life of the individual in the family. Older adults have to set the example, adjust their behavior to meet the ethical and cultural issues and relationships within the family. The old saying "the vegetables are deep," the lifestyle of parents and family members greatly affect children.
Being a good person when growing up is not easy at all. It can not be subjective to say that "parents born birth sky" that the phrase "in the round, in the tube is long" is very true for children. Education of children can not only by words but by specific tasks, all behaviors, attitudes and lifestyles of adults have a direct impact on the formation and development of the child's personality. Children will not respect adults if they see their parents showing disrespect.
When parents teach their children to be polite to their parents, but they do not respect their parents (grandparents), they will certainly never be polite to their parents, grandparents or grandparents. Parents who care about their children will pay attention to the education of the personality of the child, to teach the child not to lie to adults, to be honest and to acknowledge defects, to thank the gift . But there are also many families who are not interested in educating children, adults who treat each other with words, gestures, unrepentant acts ... these bad deeds have reflected on the immature souls of children, make the children up gruff, rude. The family environment plays a decisive role in the development of children. Family conflicts, disruptions in families or families have pushed many children into a state of total inadequacy, many of whom fail to overcome this difficulty have fallen ill with depression. , psychological disorder or homelessness, wandering, guilty.
The family factor is responsible for the initial socialization of the individual, affecting the formation of the child's original quality and personality. If these qualities are right at the beginning, the child will easily spoil. Old people said that wanting children to become traders should be near the market, want children or letters are near the school, if near theft, near the robbery sooner or later also become robbers. "Near the ink is black, near the lamp is bright," the proverbial proverb still remains valuable. Live in families with parents or other adults who have a culturally unethical behavior, including criminal offenses, such as parental discord or verbal abuse, alcoholism, drug addiction, theft , embezzlement ... these bad examples make children gradually despise law, infection of bad habits and easily attracted and then gradually break the law. Only children with strong willpower, high self-esteem, early evaluation of right and wrong will avoid these negative effects. There are also many cases where parents are good people, have sufficient knowledge but do not pay due attention to the education of their children or have no conditions close to the child, some dependents on the school, some business, make a living or go on business for a long time;
Having divorced parents, having illegitimate children, one of the two dead ... leads to abandonment of children, lack of parental education and love, no education and caring for the child. there will be psychological deviation, freedom stubborn, needless. They are easily committing crimes when they are dragged, dragged ... There are families of parents who are ignorant or uncontrollable should consider the beating or use of corporal punishment as their right. When a child is at fault, his or her parents are upset, anxious, and lash out on the child's head
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A lot of people would say that friends have more influence than family on teenagers. Some believe that family is the most important. Different people have different angles of thoughts.
Teenagers are surely influenced by their family a lot, since they know them their whole life. But teenagers usually do not listen to their parents, they go out with friends, they meet new people and try new things. They can be influenced in negative ways, which are smoking, missing from school, alcohol and even drugs. Usually, if parents do not have time for their teenager or ignore them, they are more likely to get into dangerous society and end up being influenced by friends.
On the other hand, friends can have very postive influence, for example, they can motivate you to study, they can show you new hobbies and so on.
My view is that it depends on everyone's personallity if they want to be influenced more by friends or family. I am not really influenced by friends, I just form my own opinions and stuff. Everyone is different.
I think friends have more influence but sometimes it depends on family and society how they will be influenced because not all the teenagers are the same.
There have been strong debates about whether peers have more influence than family on young people or not. Do teenagers care more about their friends than their parents? Some people adhere the opinion that friends effect on the most important decisions of their peers. I’d rather say that peers aren’t more important than parents, but sometimes peers become more important than they previously were.
It is clear that parents always want only the best for their children. The family does all it can to make the child successful by providing all the necessary assistance to the child. At any point where children are going in the wrong direction, parents will know the right way and help to understand all the mistakes, solve problems, give an important advice. It is also hard to deny that parents always accept their child as he or she really is and when the child meets his friends, who haven’t been with him for such a long period of time as family, this is not the same case, and there is no doubt that peers can propose something contrary which will not be pleasing for both sides.
On the other hand, the teenagers often spend more of their time with their friends because they want to be away from the home environment, trying new pursuits and socialising. Teenagers usually choose friends who are like thenselves, and in spite of parents best intentions, teenagers can perceive criticism of their friends as personal criticism. It can also be argued that sometimes problems can develop when parents don’t show an interest in what their children are doing and there is a breakdown in communication between children and parents. It this case teenagers may be guided by the opinion of their peers more than by the family’s opinion.
In summary, I would say that every situation depends on certain circumstances and it is always individual. But in my view, family influence is the most important in teenagers lives.
I would generally agree with the statement that friends are the most important influence on young adults. Certainly, I cannot ignore the influence that family has on young people because the parents determine their children`s` further behavior.
In my opinion, the most important influence on children is that family has. But when kids leave their usual circle of influence such as family because they become students they enter a new circle of influence of their schoolmates. In turn, their schoolmates become the most important influence on young adults until high school or college.
When children become teenagers or young adults friends are those who have not only the most important but also the strongest influence on them. There are several reasons for that. First, many teenagers leave home to study at a distant high school or college. They have already broken connections with their families and friends become the closest people around them. Second, the most frequent social contacts young adults have are with their friends which are usually at the same age. Therefore, teenagers share same interests with their friends; they have same problems and what is more they depend on each other for help or advice. In addition, it is crucially important for an young adult to be a part of the youth culture. In order to be accepted in the society teenagers have to follow the same behavior models typical of their friends.
All of above mentioned forms my opinion that friends are the most important influence on young peoples` further behavior. While some people think that the family is the most substantial factor for development of young adults I believe that friends have the most powerful effect on young peoples` attitude to the other members of the society and to the world as a whole. And sometimes that influence may last forever.